Lin’s Bin: “What Can I Do For You?”

On Mondays and Friday at 7:15am and 6:15pm, I answer your questions on the air. If you have a question go to 93XRT.com/linsbin
Here is what a wrote for yesterday’s edition.

Karen of Round Lake wrote, Dear Lin, As my best friend in the world, what can I do for you?

What can you do for me?
Your question intrudes on my motto. You know my motto, don’t you? When I meet someone and they have a simple request, I say, “Remember my motto. Whatever you want.”
And with some surprise, they say “Whatever I want?”
And I say “Yes. Whatever you want.”
And then emboldened by my generosity, they say, “Well can you get me, front row tickets to see Tom Petty?”
And I say, “No (bleeping) way.”
Kindness has its limits. Moreover, when faced with an offer of anything, most people require nothing.

What can you do for me?
There are the small things you can do to make the world a better place.
When someone is desperately trying to merge during rush hour, let them. Unless they’ve driven on the right hand shoulder and cut you off, then call the police.
Make sure your cell phone is off when you’re at the theater.

What can you do for me?
I am well-provisioned. I have more wine and whiskey than I can possibly drink in my lifetime. Of course that is partially due to my lack of optimism.

What can you do for me?
If you were a higher power with unlimited resources, I might beseech you to allow the young to live and the elderly to pass away with dignity.
To cure the incurable. To comfort the untethered. But these are not the requests you make of a friend.

What can you do for me?
Watch my back.
Make sure I have my credit card after I buy the drinks.
Remind me when it’s midnight on a Wednesday.
Believe me when I say it’s not my fault.
Don’t take me to see your brother in law’s son’s band even if you hear he’s a really good guitarist.
Offer me a taste of your spaghetti with white clam sauce because I probably ordered the duck.
Understand that when I play certain songs on the radio, it’s not for me; it’s for you.
Indulge me when I quote ancient black and white movies.

My life is an embarrassment of good fortune. My family puts up with me even when a missing television remote forces me to contemplate my place in the universe.
My brothers are my closest friends.

brudders Lins Bin: What Can I Do For You?

The Brehmer Brothers (photo by W. Brehmer)

My neighbors are like a second family. I bear no malice to anyone who wishes me well.
What can you do for me?
When I say you’re my best friend, what I’m really saying is we understand each other. What I’m saying is, your friendship is enough. I don’t require an act of loyalty. You always know who your best friends are because they’re the ones who need the least.

More from Lin Brehmer
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