Have you ever misplaced your phone? Lin’s Bin is a feature where I answer questions Mondays and Fridays at 7:15am and 6:30pm. If you have a question, please go to 93XRT.com/linsbin and ask so I can answer it on the air.
A listener asked, Where did I put my phone?
You put it in your coat. But your winter coat on the right side has a pocket without a zipper so when you drove home after dinner, you reclined the driver’s seat because you ordered the braised short ribs with whipped parsnips so you can’t drive all hunched over the steering wheel because you’re so full.
But at that angle the phone started to slip out of your pocket and when the guy cut you off on West Randolph some stuff in the back seat shifted so you didn’t hear your phone slip between the driver’s seat and the center console.
So you went inside and reached for your phone because Words with Friends will lull you into a stupor before you limp off to bed, but your phone is not in your pocket and you say to your spouse. “I put the phone in my coat pocket. Same place I always put it. Same pocket.”
And she says, did you check your other pockets and you can make either of 2 mistakes: you can roll your eyes as if that’s the stupidest question you’ve ever heard or you can say, “of course I checked my other pockets,” as if that’s the stupidest question you’ve ever heard, but in the winter you may have a lot of pockets and in the past you’ve lost your phone and searched for it in vain until you noticed that the fleece you were wearing under your coat has some really deep pockets and the phone was hidden by emergency Kleenex in case you have a sneezing fit at dinner so it really isn’t a stupid question at all.
And then the self-doubt kicks in and even though you are 100 percent sure that it was in your pocket when you left the restaurant, you wonder, “Should I call the restaurant?”
Your spouse says, “maybe it fell out in the car” and you think, hey just because that has happened one hundred and eighty three times before, doesn’t mean it’s happened again. So you go out to the car and (did I mention that it’s winter?) the wind has picked up so it’s 8 below zero and you’re not wearing a hat and gloves because you’re just doing a quick check of the car and how long could that take? But you can’t see anything in the dark and the overhead light doesn’t help but you think I can use the flashlight app on my phone except you don’t have your phone because that’s what you’re looking for.
When I lose my phone, I always have a family member call it for me so I can hear it ring except as a radio person, I always put it on silent because otherwise my closest friends who aren’t really interested in when I’m on the air call me when I’m talking to Mary on the air about the future of the free world and Mary winds up being miffed. And miffed is not what you want from a freedom fighter as fierce as Mary Dixon.
A few years ago after hosting a New Year’s Eve concert at the House of Blues, some friends and I tried to unwind at a succession of bars and nightclubs that kept telling us they were closing.
When we found one that stayed open too late, I wound up dancing to unrecognizable music and did my famous back roll across the dance floor which always empties my pockets. So when my wife got a call the next day, she handed me the phone and a voice said “I may have your phone. Were you at Studio Paris last night?” I had to answer honestly. “I don’t know.”
Where’s your phone? It’s right where you left it. This is Lin’s Bin at 93XRT.